Good bad Mum!

A few of you may have seen my article Sorry not sorry on the latest #shinestrong campaign from Pantene, which of I’m a much bigger fan since today! After seeing this commercial about how lables can change an women’s image and appearance, I got flashed by reality, because the message, that labels define a women’s image, is definitely true!

I’m a Mum and people often ask me, how I can be a full-time employee and a looking after my child at the same time. The answer to this is simple: Because I want to be both! I often get the impression people categorize me as a bad Mum, just because I’m not stay at home Mum.

Most of the time, I get this feeling from other women, which actually makes me really sad, because they should the ones who understand. Becoming a Mum changes everything in your life. You’re now responsible for a little human, who depends on you and your upbringing.

Society expects you to be a perfect working mechanism as soon as the child is born. You’re not breast-feeding? You’re a bad Mum! You have not inscribed your child for the musician early talent program? You’re a bad Mum! You start working again after the one year maternity leave? You’re definitely a very bad Mum! And you know what: This is all so wrong!

I got my child when I was 22 years old. I had no idea of how I should handle all this responsibility that comes up with a child and to be honest how should I? I think many women who get their first child experience the same struggles, but there is one important point that requires your very own decision on how to progress: Am I willing to accept help? And this is the point where I decided for me: YES!

So my son attended Kindergarden and crèche from the age of 1. The people there supported me with how to teach him to eat on his own, gave me tips for potty training and gave me so many other valuable advices I was able to benefit from! So clearly for me the decision to accept help was based on the experience I had and on the fact although I have a child I don’t want to lose myself by pretending of being someone I’m definitely not.

I respect all women who decide to stay at home with their child! Really this job is more than comparable with a full-time employee’s job as it requires a lot from a person. It’s a decision every women needs to make for herself, but the important message should be: Don’t base your decision on something your surrounding expects from you. You can never make up with their expectations! The ideal of being the perfect mother is like being a perfect human. Who needs to be perfect if you can be just yourself? So make your decision wisely and find out what makes you and your child happy!